Dowry has now become the tradition of our society. It is burden for poor families and also for those who have more than two daughters. With the passages of time this system has been expanded. Now the upper class families use this system just for showing off their wealth and even give car and house to their daughters and this creates problems for poor families.
This system is most common in the Eastern countries like Pakistan, Bangladesh, India, Iran etc. Whereas in some Western countries government has taken steps to eradicate this system and has formed plan of bride’s gift in which groom provide all that to bride. When the girl reach the marriageable age her parents start looking for a perfect match whereas boy’s parents start looking for those families who can fulfil their demands. Dowry depends upon the profession of groom. If boy is doctor girl’s parents give him car or even house. Usually boy’s parents look for those families with only daughter because they think that such families would give them car or house in dowry and even if boy will demand something, they would fulfil it. It has become problem for poor families that even for dowry they have to sale their property, take loan in lacs. Even if the groom’s family is poor bride’s family still have to give furniture appliances jewellery etc in dowry. Groom’s family do not refuse it and says it is for the ease of bride.
If they could not give them all even either they kill the bride or she commits suicide due to continuous harassment. And even some things from bride’s dowry are given in the dowry of the groom’s sister. Aforesaid factors are not the teachings of Islam, Islam only allow those things which are necessary for life but not for show off. But we have made this our culture or people say, doing this all is love of parents for their daughter or for retaining the marriage of their daughters. But all this should be changed because marriage should be done for a perfect life partner but not for perfect dowry.
Yameen Zaidi, Lahore.