CM Punjab’s Admirable Moves against Vulgarity

Punjab Chief Minister Shahbaz SharifIn his last stint Punjab Chief Minister, Shahbaz Sharif, had said that vulgarity and obscenity in the name of culture would not be tolerated and strict action would be taken against those ‘de-tracking’ the younger generation.

In his recent stint as Punjab CM he has not only reiterated his stance on vulgarity but has also warned NGOs not to impart ‘sexual education in schools’.

He also constituted a high-level committee headed by the chief secretary to take action against those who violate rules by performing vulgar dances on stage and TV and has asked people to keep an eye on NGOs introducing ‘indecent sexual education’ in the syllabus. This is a wonderful initiative taken by the Punjab CM. Especially in a pious city like Lahore, where people don’t have sex and babies just fall on mothers’ laps from the sky.

In fact, the Sindh CM, Qaim Ali Shah, should also follow suit. Otherwise cities like Karachi, Hyderabad and especially Tando Adam are in danger of becoming some of the most obscene and vulgar cities of the world (in fact the whole universe), with naked five-year-old kindergarten children discarding their pampers and indulging in vulgar dance moves on Nickelodeon.

Our leaders should realise that in Karachi too, people are always indulging in vulgar dances and irresponsibly imparting sex education in schools. Like, for example, only last Friday night the moral minority of Karachi was shocked when throngs of young men and women got drunk, poured out and started to dance on the roads of the posh Lyari area which is already known for its steamy discos, nightclubs, bars and cafes where so-called intellectuals exchange atheistic ideas over glasses of beer, brandy and bhang. Sometimes all at once.

However, the most infamous chain of clubs in Karachi remains to be the notorious Nite Keelab. This was also the club that was used by wicked film-makers in the 1970s. It was because of the activities of this club that staunch fans of Pakistan’s founder Jinnah, the Jamat-i-Islami, started a movement against the immoral Z A. Bhutto regime.

If they hadn’t done so, every Pakistani teenage girl would’ve been announcing, “Daddy, I go play badminton and dance in keelab,” on a regular basis and become a roving, rootless hippie chick, smoking hash and telling her elders “Oh you shut up, you nonsense!” The JI were able to rid the land of Bhutto, but the night clubs, bars and assorted havens of vulgarity remained.

So much so, that by the time the glorious soldier of faith, Mard-i-Momin, Mard-i-Haq, Ziaul Haq, Ziaul Haq, brought about the much-needed moral revolution, Pakistan had become the second most vulgar country after the poor, corrupt and war-torn African republic of Holland.

The Mard-i-Momin, Mard-e-Haq, Ziaul Haq, Ziaul Haq did everything a wise and decent Muslim leader could do to transform Pakistan into a country much like the beloved Saudi Arabia (minus the oil). But because of the amazing discount deals offered by the Nite Keelab on its famous chicken tikka pizzas, vulgar dancing had almost become a genetic phenomenon in Pakistan.

So, logically Mard-i-Momin, Mard-i-Haq, Ziaul Haq, Ziaul Haq decided to take the matter by the horns and rid the country of vulgarity once and for all: He banned breathing. For 11 years, Pakistan truly became the land of the pure. Though there were many deaths and millions of cases of sudden asphyxia and chronic asthma due to the ban clamped on breathing, but at least there was no vulgar dancing and sex education!

Unfortunately, the pure, decent and upright regime of Mard-i-Momin, Mard-i-Haq, Ziaul Haq, Ziaul Haq was brought to an abrupt end after a mere 11 short years. Once again, Pakistan plunged into the darkness of vulgarity and sex education. On that fateful day, Mard-i-Momin, Mard-i-Haq, Ziaul Haq, Ziaul Haq was brutally murdered by the vicious Soviet spy, Boris Becker, and infamous Indian assassin, Kapil Dev, along with the clandestine owner of the Nite Keelab, Madam Najma. – Dawn